For the past 8 years I devoted myself to my career. I worked for other companies and eventually decided to branch out on my own as a consultant.
I consult to a great company and work on Bubs. The challenge with being a consultant is that you aren’t covered by EI, which means you don’t get a maternity leave.
One week after I gave birth I had emails in my inbox from work. Thankfully I didn’t have my emails syncing to my phone otherwise I think I would have had a mental breakdown with trying to juggle Lovie’s jaundice, feeding issues and her screaming in my face for hours every night. Adding work thoughts to that would not have been good.
Motherhood hit me like a ton of bricks and even though I feel much more adapted now, there’s still a huge struggle between needing to rock my baby for hours every day and the urgency of needing to get a proposal done.
I worry that Lovie will only remember me with a computer or phone in front of my face. I hate the stress of having time limits on my tasks for work and feeling like I can’t fill them. It’s a terrible feeling to know my baby needs me and I’m getting frustrated with her because I have an email to write. I worry that I’ll wake up one day and wish I would have stared at her a little longer and cuddled her a little tighter through these stages. I can see why some women decide to stay at home exclusively.
There’s pressure to not miss out on business. We’ve all heard of the stay at home mom that goes back to work after her kids go to school only to realize she qualifies for entry-level work. I took 3 months off after giving birth and got an email that they replaced my position in that time.
Being a Mom is a full-time job. Its wonderful, challenging and hugely rewarding.
As moms we’re expected to get up multiple times in a night to care for our babies, feed, clean and teach them to sleep. Love them, take them for outings. Take care of household duties, invest in our marriage, maintain our social life and practice self-care. It’s HARD.
So, hats off to the women who ‘stay home’ to work and who work outside of the home. Each has its own demands, challenges and sacrifices!