This week started my pursuit of 2 months to a baby. I am in between contracts and am focusing solely on my side business (and curing infertility) instead of working all day everyday. My hopes are that my reduced stress level will lead to a baby.
When I envisioned my first week off I pictured me glowing and having a perfect ‘To Do’ list being checked off. With the busyness of making sure I left my old job in good hands and with Father’s day festivities, instead I fully fumbled my way into this week.
My first day off was riddled with worry about not having a second income. I felt the weight of all of the things I hope to get done in these next couple of months and felt stressed out that I couldn’t get it all done in one day.
If nothing else, this little experiment has been very revealing that I thrive on being busy, which is giving me a crisis of identity. Everything in me doesn’t want people to write me off as lazy or think that I’m at home doing nothig. I guess some people care about what people think about their looks, their money or their family. I happen to care about what people think of my work ethic. I put pressure on myself produce mass amounts of work at the expense of myself so that I can prove that I didn’t sit around watching TV all day, wasting my life. How ridiculous is that?!
Anyway, this week I spent time tying up loose ends and started my fitness routine. I am doing Jamie Eason’s LiveFit Training program and have successfully finished week 1!
There are 3 phases to her fitness plan. The first phase doesn’t involve cardio, which I have been really happy about because it’s easing me into it. I can barely move my muscles and I am walking with a serious, unintentional swagger, but I feel great! If I don’t get pregnant at least I’ll have a toned bod, right?;) The second phase has cardio and I assume that the 3rd phase is just all out craziness for a noodle armed girl like me.
I am looking forward to having a bit less to do next week so that I can fully get into a rhythm and officially plan out my schedule!